Stay-at-home mom bad habits happens and if you don’t believe me read on friend!
Oh, I wanted to be a stay at home mom so bad that we made a big decision and decided to achieve my financial goal and after 15 years working retail I did it.
I love being a stay at home mom.
The dream of becoming a stay at home mom and raising my kids was finally happening.
I love that I was able to do what I had to do to become a stay at home mom. I am thankful that I can be home with my children when many others who want to be with their children can't.
The truth is this.
Not every stay at home mom is the same.
Reality is not what we think our at home journey is going to be.
And that is OK!
Let’s be real here for a minute, can we?
Some moms just love being a stay at home mom. They enjoy it and find it to be their calling.
Being a mom is hard as it is and if you are not finding the joy you thought when you became a stay at home mom, that is normal.
Again, I go back to not everyone mom being the same.
The reason I tell you this is because I became a stay-at-home mom with a perception and the reality was completely different.
Since becoming a stay at home mom, I developed what I call stay-at-home mom bad habits.
I was a great stay at home mom, but I was missing something. I wasn't fulfilled.
I felt terrible and guilty that I wasn’t happy or finding the joy I was going to find when I took on my stay at home adventures.
Before we continue, let me point out some facts for those ready to pass judgment.
- This is not a stay at home mom working mom debate.
- Many stay-at-home moms are not at home because they want to, but out of circumstances.
- Just because it works out for you doesn’t mean it works out for the other moms.
When I first wrote this article, I was so afraid I was going to be judge, but the truth is that I wasn’t alone!
From what I've been hearing and reading many stay-at-home moms develop these bad habits as well.
The only way to get over these bad habits is to recognize them and do something about it.
There are 3 stay-at-home bad habits that I was guilty of, and many of you as well. As you read this, you will recognize them and know exactly what I am talking about.
Don't be afraid of what these bad habits are; we are going to overcome them.
Even if you are a working mom, you are going to relate to these bad habits as well so don't feel excluded. Guess these bad habits affect all moms alike.
Stay At Home Mom Bad Habits
Not doing anything for myself
Many moms fall into this because we are givers! This was happening for quite some time, and though I usually go out with my friends once a month, I didn't do much for myself.
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When I go shopping, I shop for my family, not for me. When I go out with my friend, I think of the kids and what they are doing.
I really want a nice haircut and a pedicure, but I put it for later, and later never comes.
Since being a stay at home mom, I have focused all my attention on my family. When the rest of your family tells you to go do something fun for you and hands you a gift card to go spend it on you; you know there's an issue!
As moms, we are programmed or made feel that we should put others needs first, and this is not true at all.
Remember ladies that a happy mami equals a happy family. Taking care of yourself and making your priority is nothing to feel bad about.
Not feeling like I contribute to the family
I have been stressing over this since I lost my job. I have been working at it, and it's getting better, but I can see how many moms feel this way. Sometimes I sit here and wonder if I'm pulling my weight in this family.
Sad, but true.
I do think that way sometimes.
Then, I kick myself for feeling this way. I do contribute to our family. Not financially, but I do.
Just like my husband contributed to our family when I worked and he stayed home with the children.
I never once questioned that and was grateful that he was able to do this for our family. Without him, we will not be where we are now.
Not once did he ever mentioned anything about me not contributing at all. Guess number 1 bad habit comes from this.
Not everything is about money or about what role do I play in this family. The house is clean, the entire family is taken care of, and our finances are taken care of.
This is an important part of maintaining a well-balanced home.
In the future when I start feeling this way all I have to do is look at what we have accomplished and what we have since I became a stay at home mom.
Money or material things don’t defy me as a mom is how well we raise our children and that doesn’t cost a thing!
Being ashamed of my stay at home status
Whether you made the decision to stay at home because you wanted to be with your children or base on your finances, or for whatever the reason might be, Never, EVER, feel ashamed to say that you are a stay at home mom.
My first thought when I made the decision to become a stay at home mom was that people were going to judge. Yes, that people were going to say, “why did you leave your good paying job to stay at home?”
Leaving my job was a decision that our family made and one I posted about here. I have wanted to spend more time with my children and decided a few years back to start paying my debt and start saving to become a stay at home mom.
It was a goal we set out for ourselves and thanks to controlling our finances we were able to achieve.
I felt that stay at home moms are judged unfairly just like working moms are. But because I had a great paying job some people were not going to understand my decision.
I know that is no one's business but our own, but let's be honest those comments do sting a bit. Of course many only see what I’ve done now, not the hard work it took to get everything settled before I was able to quit my job.
I was surprised at how many family members and friends and neighbors praised the fact that I decided to leave my job to stay at home with our children.
I love how much love and support I get from my family and friends about this major decision. This helps me feel better and assures me every day that I made the right decision.
Have you been guilty of these stay at home mom bad habits? Tell us about it!